On my mind

I haven't stopped thinking about this little boy since I saw this: http://jezebel.com/5748688/mom-could-lose-kids-over-hot-saucing-punishment.

If you want the full story, you can go here: http://www.drphil.com/shows/show/1545/?preview&versionID.

In case you haven't checked these out its about and Alaskan mom who punishes her 7 year old boy she adopted along with his twin from Russia. As punishment for lying, she makes the boy gargle hotsauce and take cold showers.

I just want to hug that little boy and let him know that this isn't what mothers do to their children.

At this stage in the game, I'm very lucky(and maybe a decent parent too) that Avalon is generally a very well behaved little girl. So I don't understand what its like to have a difficult child. However, judging from the video, the little boys infractions seem like what most other little boys would do at that age. And no matter how Avalon could act, I COULD NEVER do that to her. That's not to say children don't need consequences but this woman's treatment was in humane at best.

Needless to say, he hasn't left my thoughts since I saw it. However, while many people are still thinking about this boy because of the shock, disgust and out of sympathy, I really can empathize with this child. I grew up in a home just like that and to some extent probably worse.

And while I don't talk about much of that anymore, this boys story reminded me of some things that hadn't thought of in years. I remember my dad making my brothers take a shower outside with the lawn hose because they hadn't cleaned up the bathroom they way he thought they should.

I just want to tell that little boy, that he does not have to let this woman and her actions define his life. The day will come(and for him probably not for 10ish years) when he can make his own choices and decisions and choose not to live that way or continue the cycle. I truly wish that he can overcome this and does not lead him to a life of anger that can have far serious consequences as an adult. I just hope that his mother gets the justice she deserves and will not hurt her child anymore.

Understand this, the damage is done. As I wrote on a facebook post, "What she is doing is scarring that child for life. He will never forget what she has done. He may forgive her for it but he will never forget. Doing what she has done will leave an imprint on him for the rest of his life. And if we are leaving imprints on our child, don't we want them to be positive? That's not to say a child won't need punishment or consequences, but this was absurd and totally out of line. It was especially tough for me to watch because he is so young and helpless."